This is me …Care Leaver – Age 18
I’ve been through so much pain, but i didn’t know that i was hurting.
All these bad decisions, because my vision was uncertain.
Lonely in my cell, but i can’t see it as a burden, i just put it down too all the pain I’ve given, now I’m deserving.
I blame it on myself, i guess I’m tired of blaming you, unaccepting the truth was just the easy thing to do.
And i know that cause you love me, you always will forgive me. But I’ve worn out all the chances that you gave me it’s a pity.
Alone with all the silence, sick and tried with no virus. And my mind sets tired, always rhyming bout my violence, n at the bottom where my life is, you can see it in my eye lids.
Just a bunch of little minors playing run outs with the sirens.
Looking at these walls, thinking how i played the fool, but you never value time when you’re young and breaking rules.
Like I’m way to cool, 13 f school. And my mother tried to show me, but i thought i knew it all. Now I’m 18, looking back, d*m that went fast. Feels like just the other day, I was sitting in my class. Wasn’t thinking about my future, now I’m writing about my past. Never listen to the tutor, always came in class last. Now I’m last place, at one point d*m i was 1st. But i know it’s better than me laying in a Hurst !
Turn this pain to reverse, n all the ashes that emerged, and when they hit me with the bird, i thought this blessing was a curse. But the one thing for real, make mistakes, you better learn. The first time stings, but the second time burns.
And the world still turns, whilst my case gets adjourned. But you try n stay firm is the only concern.
And my life had to change, cause it aint about me. My sister writing letters, I can’t even see.
Be real with yourself, cause your freedom aint free. The long way n the sweat. The short cut makes you bleed.
The hard head never hears, till they break your mind.
Think you see s**t clear, but the blind lead the blind.
When you step between tracks, better take your time.
Little youngen on them steps, like im gonna take what’s mine.
And that’s big facts, no cap. If I could I would go back.
Use to show love, but love never got shown back.
Throwback, in n out flats with them old cats, old racks, use to tell me i could make it if i sold packs.